Ugh, there is just too much going on right now. It's week 9 of the quarter, always a special time when you start to completely freak out over the amount of work left to do. In my case, this time, it's not too horrible and certainly doable. But it's still not fun to anticipate the work ahead over the next 3 weeks.
On top of the end of quarter madness I have this ECF fellowship to apply for. I got most of it done over the weekend and I'm pretty proud of my work. If they don't take me it will just be because they don't think my topic is that worthy, and that's OK. Also I'm not an east-coaster and I wonder if that won't hurt me. But I have kick ass recommendations and, I think, a sexy topic. So who knows? It could be as much as $15,000 - what a difference that would make!! Of course, there's still the little matter that I continue to have questions about filling out the application, and the general response time from people there is about 2-4 weeks for emails and 2-4 days for phone calls (if ever). That's what's got me tense at the moment: knowing that the second I mail this puppy off - filled out best I could - I'll finally hear back with the answers to my questions. Oh, well, I gotta let that go and pray they won't hold my weird answers against me.
Then there's the GTU who are anxious for my answer about whether I'm coming there. Which of course would be helped by knowing about the fellowship, but I don't find out about that until May 15 and GTU wants an answer a month earlier. Plus I'm supposed to hear THIS week or next at the latest from my other two schools, so that's a bunch o anticipation to carry around! I can't believe I'll be actually making this decision in the next couple weeks (even as I am also writing exegesis and systematics papers). I'm about to find out what, if anything, will be offered to help me pay for these others, too. And poor J is trying to find schools to work at in the bay area and Canada! But he can't commit to anything until I commit to someplace.
It's like I'm living in two dimensions - one in the present, finishing at Fuller, and one in the future, working out everything for this fall.
I'm even already applying for apartments in Berkeley! It's nutso! I have to have those apps in immediately as well - everything is due NOW or yesterday. And along with the apps they want money money money of course, $500 to one school(!) which they will hold for the next 2 months until they tell me they don't have room for us. Fun.
It's so weird - everything's due NOW; my decisions are due in one month; and my answers (about apartments, fellowship, possibly some financial aid) aren't coming for two months. And oh yeah, I have a baby due in 3 months. Geezu. I'm even already trying to help my mother plan her visit here for the birth; and my in-laws want to visit in August (but unfortunately just after we'll have moved, not in time to help us move. Great). I mean seriously, how many time zones am I living in?
Anyway I just needed to vent. I'm trying to keep my cool and keep rolling my neck and shoulders around (listening to all those little bones crack is so soothing). And there's some fun planned for this week: Weds I get to see Rufus Wainwright at USC, in a small theater, which will be unbelievably awesome (he's probably the only performer I'd pay good money to see, and I got the tix free!), and Thurs is a going-away for my old boss at USC so I get to go down again and see all my old friends. So I'm quite happy about those things. This week should just get better and better. Just gotta get through Monday!
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