First Day

Oh, I am so burned! The death class is beyond ridiculous. I think there are over 85 people in it! The prof said that he was asked whether he wanted to cap it at 50 but he didn't want to - well, now he's sorry. Dang it. I was thinking it would be 20 people or so - a nice small group able to really get into the material, really share our stories. Now he's talking about how the class won't work if people don't show up - I don't see how it will work if they do! This is insanity. There's simply no way to discuss this topic in sucha huge setting. How can anyone get real about this?

We're going to have small groups for the last 15 mins of class (wonder where that many groups will go?), but I still fear not being able to really learn. This class - really, so many classes here...I never had undergrad classes this big. I thought grad school would be smaller, not larger! I would leave the class but I don't know what else I could take. I'm so pissed. Bad, bad idea.

I can only pray that people are very, very bored tonight or turned off by the topic or maybe the prof will cry and people will want to leave.

By the way, Kitty woke up fine this morning. Prayer works.

[Later]

People's experiences are shared. We've known people who died from the ages of 11 minutes to 105. More younger than older people have died. Several suicides, overdoses.

The prof has a way of making the 100 people seem intimate. And everyone has a story to tell. It just might be OK. At any rate, it will probably be smaller next week. I'll wait it out. I met some cool people I want to keep getting to know. And tons of friends are in the class. And I want to take the class so badly. It will be okay. All shall be well, right?