Saturday, February 03, 2007


Today's beautiful things:
1. I finished reading my 100 pages of Luther. I wouldn't say Luther himself is all that beautiful, but hey, I'm done and it's only 2:30. That means I still have half a Saturday left!
2. Playing with my friend's new kitten. Oh, we had such a great time last night. He's a total sweetie. His name is Krishna so I kept singing the Beatles "My Sweet Lord" to him, which he loves, and when I call him "Lord Krishna" he squeaks.
3. The support of friends, not least of whom are you guys.

So a couple things have transpired and I shall ruminate upon them. Oh, first, I have to tell a funny story. My prof has us reading all these translations that were done in the 50s and 60s so the language is a bit out of fashion. It's not quite like reading Shakespeare, but occasionally very funny. Like when Luther said he didn't "give a fig" about something, and then another place where they used the phrase "jot and tittle" which always sends me into ridiculous giggling. But we got curious about jot and tittle, especially because it's used in some Bible translations in Matthew 5:18 when Jesus says not one "jot and tittle" of the law will pass away. So then I had to look it up in Greek, which says "iota and keraia." Out came the BDAG (that's a lexicon for those of you stinkers who don't have to take Greek) and we discovered that keraia is a serif, like the little extra lines put on letters. And "tittle" is the same thing (we have an ancient dictionary too). Iota was the smallest letter (just a little line), so it's essentially a jot. So how about that!

Hey it gave me a break from Luther for a good 10 minutes.

Anyway, I wanted to report on the GLBT group and the clothing exchange. Let's do the good news first: people showed up to the group last night. Only 3, but it was a start. They were all people who already believe like we do on this issue, so it wasn't as interesting a conversation as it might have been. Regardless, it was nice to chat. Everyone had stories to tell and I imagine there are many more around campus. My friend and I have a dream that this might be the beginning of a "GLBT concerns committee" at Fuller. Maybe 10 years from now it will be a full-on accepted group. Who knows? Everything has to start somewhere.

Mostly we talked about what to do next. We are thinking of digging into the biblical texts that people use to clobber homosexuals, perhaps using Countryman's Dirt Greed & Sex. We are also considering putting together an information packet for our fellow students that explains that people who are on board with ordination/marriage for gays and lesbians can in fact actually be creedal Christians with a high view of the authority of Scripture. I don't care if they agree with me, but I am tired of it being assumed I've thrown out the Bible. Just realize that I love the Bible as much as anybody and my position is scriptural, not anti-so, to me.

So I am encouraged. I think it might be interesting to just post some signs around campus that say "GLBT: Let's Talk About It" with an anonymous email address. Maybe we'll find some more interested people that way. I know there are gay people at Fuller (it's kind of a don't ask don't tell policy, with I think a stipulation of "don't act or you're kicked out"). I hope we can support them. But yeah, none of us really knows what would happen if there were an openly out student. We're all curious.

And then this morning I went to the clothing exchange, and it was about what I expected it to be. Mostly I took home the stuff I'd brought. I didn't find anything I liked better. I took home a lot less than I had donated, but I did find a nice pair of pants, a sweater, and pajama pants (I had taken in 12 pieces of clothing). I took in 16 accessories but only found about 6 to take home (in that dept, though, the good stuff was just gone. I'd seen what I wanted the day before but missed it). And I took home the same 2 pairs of shoes I'd brought.

It did make me feel pretty depressed though. For one thing, the stuff was arranged by size in different rooms so it was pretty lonely back in the L's. And it was all old lady clothes! Ugh! All the cute stuff was in the "S" room. The L stuff was my mom's style. I guess I'm the size of a 60 year old. I guess that's when we're finally allowed to "let ourselves go."

I did check out the maternity in the hopes of finding something cute but it was pretty picked over (we have no shortage of growing bellies around campus).

What we do seem to have a drastic shortage of, however, is breasts. I don't get it. Doesn't anybody realize that women are actually supposed to be busty? They make clothes that are in no way designed for a gal with a rack. So you wind up buying too big and looking frumpy or buying your size and looking like a whore. At least I can take comfort in having a chest, although that seems to have become less important than it was in, say, junior high.

I tried on a lot more than I took. The trying on was miserable. These jeans said they were a 15 and wouldn't go up my thighs. I do not understand. Jeans are like the worst invention ever. They only look good on women who are shaped like teenage boys (or rather, lack of shaped)!! I once read that high fashion clothes are for skinny women b/c they are designed by gay men who find male forms sexy, so they create clothes for women, supposedly that look sexy, that are actually designed for boys. I don't mean to imply gay designers are pedophiliacs, but there is some resonance when you look at the boobs, no hips, flat and basically paper doll cutout women.

I'm pleased that Spain is making it a law that mannequins have to be what in America is a size 8. That's the size I was for a very long time. It would have been nice to have seen that size in store windows. Instead, when I was an 8 and 10 for several years, I thought I was horribly fat. Now I'd do an awful lot to be that size again.

Anyway, the exchange thing didn't work out too well. It was disappointing and just confirmed my fears that I am bigger than most women and/or there are no cute clothes for people shaped like me. Bummer.

I did, however, restrain myself from screaming at the stick-thin chick rifling through the larges. I wanted to yell, "Get out of here! You don't get to take the only cute stuff in my size! Get thee to the X-tra Small!"

I think that deserves a big pat on my big back. :)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Ohhhhh Sweetie.... Now you stop beating up on yourself. You are NOT bigger than most women. I've done a lot of research on this subject and in fact, over half the women in the U.S. wear a size 12 & up. I think we 'big girls' just tend to notice the thin women more often. I'm sorry the clothing exchange didn't work out so good for you. I posted a message suggesting that you not go...but I was too late. Still, you did find a few items.

I know what you mean about the styles of plus-size clothing. My daughter (she's almost 30) hates the selections that are in stores. That's why she's trying so hard to get some of her designs into more stores. But it's no easy task. (She's a designer.) As you pointed out, the store buyers seem to think everyone plus-sized has got to be senior citizens with no taste. I'm in my 50's and even I hate the crap they're selling.

Well... I hope you'll dust yourself off and perk up. I'll bet you're still as beautiful on the outside as you are on the inside.