Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Dear Anonymous Poster

It sounds like you're having a really bad night. I shouldn't have let you get to me. Please email me off-blog if there is something you'd like me to pray about or help you with. I certainly understand stress - lately I've been really down, too.

You sound like you have a lot of ideas and have really had some valuable life experience. I would recommend that you create a blog to post your thoughts and let the world see things your way. Indeed, blogger is a wonderful invention that allows each of us to have our own little space in which to share our personal take on things. On Feminary, I talk about the things that are affecting me right now, and I welcome people to read and take from it what they will. But I will rarely feel the need to defend myself, since these are just my own thoughts about the world and certainly nobody has to agree with me for me to feel good about them. They are good because they are mine - they are a record of my journey, which I am living as authentically as I can, with God's help.

It's only polite to create your own blog to post the long essays that you are writing on mine. Please feel free to use my posts as your starting point to write about topics on your blog. I would take this as a compliment. I would also be fine for you to post in my comments the links to your blog, where you may feel free to talk as long as you like in response to the things that I say.

If you need assistance with creating your blog, blogger has a very easy-to-use help section.
Blessings upon you - and hooray for freedom of speech!

The Feminarian


Anonymous said...


Well, you have tempered your language. Good for you.

As to our work experience. I have been working since I was 17, more than 36 years. My work experience is nearly 3 times as long as yours. It is also much more varied, as I stated, I have worked for both state and federal governments, for a private corporation and for a private law firm. I have also spent nearly a decade in undergraduate or graduate level academic work. So I have been exposed to more of the world of work than you have in your ten years.

The time span is considerably different. Things were very different before 1975 than they are now. A very, very big difference. Your post entitled "Because I'm a wooooman"
contains a litary of miscellaneous complaints about your alleged mistreatment.

When asked for specifics you mention a comment someone allegedly made to you about "acting like a man." Well, Feminarian, if you are really so passionate for justice, then file suit. Do something about it rather than throwing a fit. Document, gather evidence, prepare a well-supported complaint. Get legal counsel if necessary. If you are a champion of women, then full speed ahead.

In the early 1970's I had to appear and argue cases in front of a judge who openly stated that he didn't believe in "women lawyers." I won several cases in front of that judge. Before he retired we were cordial professional friends.
I have represented literally thousands of clients and I have fought hundreds of battles in court. I never had a perfectly level playing field, none of us women lawyers did, but we fought intelligently and we won our share of cases.

You might try giving some respect to a woman who was one of the first women to make a career in trial law. Somehow I can't think that Episcopalian clerics are as rough on you as a bona fide flesh-ripping male trial lawyer was on me. Mostly they paid me the complinent of fighting hard against me, no holds barred. I didn't feel the need to post my little diary on the web and complain.

Try winning someone over for a change OR absent that, fight intelligently and effectively and make a difference.

What I hear from you is an uncontrolled temper and whining, not effective action

Anonymous said...

Being Too Smart is Never a Problem

Feminarian writes:
Sometimes I wish I didn't care so much. I wish I weren't so intelligent and opinionated too. I wish I wasn't so talented and passionate. I wish I could just be a normal person.

But I am not. And what I am is incredibly threatening. And very hard to work with.

Being smart is never a problem. Now Feminarian claims she is a victim of anti-IQ discrimination. Sure. Smart people figure out legitimate ways to meet their goals. Smart people find effective ways to work with other people, even if those other people are too stupid to recognize the volcano of genius that the smart person is. I never heard Bill Gates complain that people are "threatened" by him.

This really sounds like a twelve year old, not a 36 year old woman with ten year's work experience.

Truly smart people have people skills, and leadership skills, they are not "hard to work with."

Where is all that hoo-haa about "women's relationship skills." People with relationship skills aren't "hard to work with."
I doubt that good pastors are "hard to work with."

Anonymous said...

Dear everyone,

I was busy yesterday and missed all the shenanigans and boy has it stressed out my morning. I'm only half through my first cup of coffee after all. But here is my proposal. Let us all ignore Anonymous.

I miss waking up to an inspiring post from a non-harassed Feminarian.

Jennifer J. Thweatt-Bates
Princeton Theological Seminary

Kathy L. said...

Well! This little spat brings a long time lurker to finally comment.

Ms. Anonymous seems like she wouldn't be much fun to be with. I come from long, unhappy experience with people who just want to be *right* at all costs. Perhaps it is an unfortunate confluence of religious and professional characteristics that make Anonymous' debate style so unpleasant.

I am about her age, so maybe my experience in life by definition carries more weight than someone younger than I. Maybe not. Methinks she tosses around this ad hominem argument with abandon.

Ms. A. has had a self-professed illustrious career which she chalks up entirely to her own efforts. A small nod to the costly struggle of many women for decades that has paved the way for her individual success would be refreshing. Its not over yet, either.

And I'm irritated that Ms A. counsels that the legal system is *the* way to deal with Feminary's complaints, otherwise they're not legitimate. Heaven forfend there would be any other way to deal with an issue but to go straight to court.Oh, yeah, that's her job.

Memorial Day is not a Christian holiday by any stretch of the imagination. This in no way precludes Christians honoring war dead. (Anybody here ever been to Yasukuni Shrine?) Acknowledging the futility of war seems fairly Biblical to me, swords into plowshares and all. History's best generals readily acknowledge the futility of war. I know plenty of dead veterans' relatives,and I think they are the ones that have the keenest awareness of the futility of war. Futility is precisely what makes the sacrifice of a persons life in war so worthy of our appreciation. We shall avoid veering off into a discussion of what constitutes a "just war" or the appropriateness of capsule history lessons in the Prayers of the People.

Anonymous is in no danger of winning this someone over any time soon. A name would help. Am baffled as to the reason Ms. A has taken on the mantle of responsibility to lecture you with such presumption.

I do agree that word choices can weaken a point.

Feminarian, let's go have a pint. I spent a year in seminary in the early 70's but Hebrew did me in! We could talk!

Kathy Lautz

Anonymous said...

Indeed! Hebrew does a lot of us in! May I tag along for that pint?

Mark Baker-Wright said...

I can't speak for Feminarian, but as a user of the same blog-system, I can attest that it is possible to block anonymous posts. I, myself, have opted not to do this, since I want to allow all my friends (including the ones I haven't met yet) to post without making them go through a process of telling the computer who they are. YMMV, of course.